Schnitzel Match Report – Queens Birthday 2011

THE THING I LOVE MOST ABOUT SCHNITZEL ‘N TITS IS THAT YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT. IT’S A WILD CARD EVERY TIME…AND I HAVE TO SAY THAT I AM NEVER DISAPPOINTED!

Tuesday the 7th was a cold wintery night but the heat was on as soon as you entered the realms of Schnitzel N Tits. If the idea of cheap jugs of beer doesn’t warm your heart, maybe the $5 shots will. It was birthdays galore on this night (not that you need to be celebrating anything) and I think some of our younger b’day peeps may have lost their virginity this fine, arctic evening.

The beautiful Sarah Ryan eased us into the night with a classic burlesque number. Her sweet, girl next door, naughty but nice act left a smile on everyone’s lips. Sarah weaved her way through the audience with a bit of cheek and titillation as she searched for a flaccid lap to sit on (not many to choose from I can tell you…) and writhe to the music with eager onlookers wishing it was them that she had chosen.

Into interval, everyone has their appetite satisfied with food, drink and the first taste of the talent. Quick smoko and everyone is set for act two… or are they? Open the gates and let this Hellcat out!!!

MISHKA!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!! That pretty much sums it up.

This wild girl came in and rocked every mans world. It was a sex education for us all. I always thought every porn film should be called “Things that will never happen to you”. But if you were here at Schnitzel N Tits this night, that saying is out the window. The moves, the suggestion, the incredible poses, left a long line for a cold shower. Two of our audience members were lucky enough to seek special attention from Mishka. Our first had his pants dropped and ridden like a pony. Our second, with bare arse, was whipped! He must have been a very naughty boy. All in the name of entertainment!

Since the audience participation was running hot, a few rounds of Trivia questions left some punters with some nice prizes. A game of “Whose Boobs?” proves that a lot of you study celebrity mammaries as a favourite pastime and some great moments were caught on camera with our “Dirty Pervs” segment.

The babalicious barmaids kept everyone entertained with their intermittent strips… a great way to order more drinks, slippery nipple anyone? Lil’ Roscoe spun out the tunes to keep everyone vibed and in party mode (Check out this guys CD – it’s in hot demand!).

Then the final act was up. Skopalova. Everyone’s favourite. She showed us how rhythmic gymnastics is so very sexy. Incredible flips, a wave of ribbon, and a smile that melts every mans heart. Skopalova always leaves you wanting more. That’s why she’s such a tease.

The end of the night was upon us. A time to sit back, have one for the road and chat to your favourite performers. A lot left this evening a little more frazzled than when they came in. But that’s what it’s all about – expect the unexpected at Schnitzel ‘N Tits!

We’ll see you at the next one!